A great lesson from...acne

 I have gone through several different phases of "self-esteem development," with a few definitive milestones.  One was a few years ago. I was feeling particularly self-conscious because of a very intrusive zit right in the middle of my forehead.

Thanks be to all that is fair...I had decided to grow bangs a few months prior, so I had a handy shield. Perfect...pull the bangs this way, curl them just so and...no zit.

Only problem was, I was so uncomfortable. It was hot, and my hair felt yucky on my forehead. I felt distracted because I kept fidgeting, making sure the hair had not shifted out of place. Finally I took a head band, pulled all my hair back and tied it up in a bun on top of my head. I instantly felt better. I was more physically comfortable and I didnt have to worry if anyone would see my acne because I knew that they could!  I don't have to have perfect skin, which means that I don't have to hide my skin when it is imperfect.  What if we let go of our need to be right, our need to be perfect, our need to be constantly shiny and clever and brilliant and talented? What if we could be more free, more comfortable, less distracted and more available to pay attention to what we love, who we love and how we can love better?

It has been very freeing for me to realize that I don't always have to have clear skin or, more importantly, to be great at "it" (whatever that "it" happens to be), to know the answer, to have it figured out, to understand, to get it. Consider stepping out from behind your respective bangs the next time you have an imperfection.  See what it might feel like to let go of the false belief that you must hide imperfections and embrace the freedom that comes with being who you are, where you are, when you are there.

Be you.

Don't look for joy, open up to it

When I hear people (or myself) say that they are looking for joy, peace, meaning, happiness...I have to take a pause.
Although I don't totally disagree with this idea of "looking" for joy and meaning, I have to admit this phrase evokes a bit of frustration because it describes my current state as lacking these qualities and suggests that joy and happiness are hiding...and if I don't find them, they will elude me.

What I feel, what I have experienced and what I have grown to truly believe is that joy, meaning, peace, love (all the good stuff) exist right here, right now, all the time.  Love is all around. Peace is available always. Meaning does not exist when you find it - it was there all the time. As is happiness.

Rather than looking for happiness or peace, I want to be open to seeing the peace and happiness that is here now. I want to change how I see, how I perceive, so that I can have access to these qualities.

I don't have to go looking for them, they are not hiding. I  don't have to search, in hopes that I look in the right spot at the right time and find them.

I choose to open my perspective, to tune my senses, to focus my vision so that I can see, feel and experience the joy, peace, meaning and happiness that are here now. 

What is perfectly right, joyful, meaningul, peaceful about this exact moment? I am thirsty, and I just grabbed a glass of water. That's just rigth in this moment.